Not intended for children
Some adult language
My story begins like so many others, but no one has the same story so here is mine. I can never remember being thin. From a very young age, my brother and I grew up in and out of foster care. We were placed in the hands of strangers to care for us. All of them were very neglectful and abusive to both my brother and I. A lot of times we were left to fend for ourselves or completely on our own. At one point we lived with a couple for quite some time until the woman of the house died. I remember being very frightened when she died. Her husband quickly became an alcoholic and thus ended up being very neglectful. We would go days without bathing, and the house was dirty and infested with roaches. I learned to cook at a pretty young age in order to take care of both my brother and I. Filling our bellies consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, fried eggs, and sugary cereals. One of our favorite dinners was a sandwich of bread and butter with sugar on it (Yes, I know that sounds disgusting). At times, we would eat anything we could get our hands on just to get full which often meant sneaking food. This went on for years. This is when my eating habits developed, and I began to eat anything I could get my hands on. This was my escape especially after times of physical and sexual abuse that happened daily and often more than once a day. So I began to eat. I ate when I was hurting, confused, and afraid and I ate even more when I was worried about my brother.
October 1983 Finally, our misery came to an end. My brother and I were adopted. Though our abuse stopped, my abuse with food did not. As I adjusted to my permanent home and new family, I continued to eat. Through my teen years, I began to get heavier and heavier. My adopted mother, truly the only mother my brother and I have ever known, made relentless attempts to put me on a “diet.” This made me resent her and made me feel as though I would never be good enough for her or anything else in life. All through high school, I was on and off diets such as 1000-calorie diets and Slim Fast Shakes. My mother at one point even bought me subliminal music in order to “help” me lose weight. I also did the whole binge and throw up thing for a while. I was desperate and wanted my mom to like me. I just wanted to be good enough; but, I had no self-worth and I snuck fast food and junk food all the time. My love for Diet Coke, food, and baked goods got out of control as I went through culinary school. My weight was steadily climbing. When I moved out on my own, I remember waking up in the middle of the night thinking to myself, “I can eat anything I want.” I was not aware of this at the time, but clearly my food addiction was in full swing and I never thought I had a problem.
Marvin When I met my Husband in 1992, he did not seem to mind that I weighed 200 pounds. Marvin and I married in 1993. My family always loved me; but, for the first time in my life, I felt loved, wanted, needed, and finally good enough. When it came to my food choices, though not his fault, Marvin supported them. Whatever I wanted to cook for us was fine with him. Marvin was and continues to be the love of my life. As our marriage grew, we took vacations and it would be fun to find different plus-size clothing stores. At times, Marvin would spend hundreds of dollars in one particular store. I would usually walk in and start pulling things off the rack. It was fun and made me feel good. So I started to not care about my weight, but deep down wanted so desperately to be thin. As time went on, I continued to eat whatever and whenever I wanted. I was even diagnosed with type 2 diabetes on the same day I suggested to Marvin that we go have pizza for dinner. So life went on going from over-weight to obese to morbidly obese. At times I would try to lose a few pounds here and there. I was joining gym after gym after gym. I never stayed because I was too embarrassed to even give most of it a try. After a while, I just gave up. I figured, why bother. Marvin loved me for who I was and how big I was, BUT I DID NOT LOVE ME. Over the years, I had made some lasting friendships and they didn’t care about my weight, so why should I. Life continued with my knees hurting, my back hurting, my diabetes, taking insulin and still eating anything and everything I wanted with my weight steadily climbing.
Sophia June 1st, 2006 was the day I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant with my daughter. I was happy, yet very confused. I had always told everyone that I did not want children; it was really easier that way. I am not saying that I did not want children, but with my weight I knew it would be hard on the baby and me. Right away, I was placed in the high-risk category. I had to see the Obstetrician twice a month. I had Ultra-sounds of Sophia every single month. The last weekend of my pregnancy, I was put on bed rest due to my blood pressure being too high. By the time my precious Sophia was born, my weight had ballooned to 380. The second I laid eyes on her, she instantly became the reason for my existence. As Sophia grew from an infant to a toddler, keeping up with her was exhausting. At times, just playing with her or keeping her from harm would leave me out of breath. I remember thinking one day if I didn’t do something about my weight, I was sure to never see her grow up. So, again, life went on and I returned to drinking my Diet Coke. I would rather have that than breakfast and often that’s exactly what I did. I remember when Sophia was old enough to go to preschool, I would drop her off and then go through the drive-though at Burger King and order 2 sausage and cheese croissants and the biggest Diet Coke. I did this every day for at least 6 weeks. Then another food kick would start in. and on and on it went.
Adam OCT 28th, 2012, life as I knew it came to a screeching, sreaming, and complete stop. Life has never been the same nor will it ever be. My only brother died which was something that will forever be burned into my memory. I can remember every conversation and detail of that day like a time-line. Adam was 38 years old, healthy, and not over-weight. He also ate pretty healthy. Adam originally collapsed from a bowel obstruction, but after hours and hours of surgery and relentless attempts to save him, they could not. I watched my beloved Adam take his last breath. It was really something out of a horror film. Still, to this day, I cannot stand the sight and smell of blood. Even certain sounds will forever haunt me. During my time of immense mourning, I continued to eat EVERYTHING. I did not know how to cope, and some days I couldn’t even get out of bed. Also during this time, I began to really think long and hard about my weight. I thought if my healthy brother died, then I was sure to follow. I did not even know where to start, so I continued to do what I did best, drink Diet Coke and eat. I even started passing out and thinking I was having a heart attack. My legs, back and chest were constantly hurting. On top of that, my heart was completely broke. I had seen several doctors and even had to wear a heart monitor for a weekend. After several tests, I was diagnosed with PTSD (from the death of my brother) and Anxiety. When the fog lifted from my grief (about 2 years), I still felt like crap. So I decided that if I was going to do something about my weight, I needed to do it.
Vertical Sleeve Gastronomy (VSG)
I began to ask my Doctor about some weight loss options. She suggested it was time to have weight loss surgery. She gave me the number to call Mercy Weight Loss and Nutrition Center. Before I made my call, I spoke with Marvin about my plan. Marvin, the quiet type, did not say much; but he fully supported my decision. So, the next day I made my call. I remember shaking as I was punching in the numbers. I kept thinking is this what a drug addict or alcoholic feels when they make their first call for help. As a woman one the other end picked up, I began to cry and be unable to catch my breath while talking to her. From the day of my first call to surgery date it took about a year. This began as classes, seminars, 6 months of diet and exercise counseling, meeting with the nutritionist and surgeon. The first time I saw the surgeon, he stated that my goal would be to lose 200 pounds. I remember him telling me I would need to find an exercise program and I flat out told him I was ready to change but he would never see me in a gym. It was just too hard. I left his office in tears thinking this guy was out of his damn mind. How could anyone like me lose that much weight? So, I went to the nearest gas station to drown my sorrows in the biggest Diet Coke I could get. During these classes I began to learn more and more about how hard I would have to work for the rest of my life. I also discovered that I would never be able to have caffeine, pop, and certain other foods. During this time, I stocked up on pop BIG TIME. I was drinking 2-3 two liters of Diet Coke every day. I would drink more on stressful days. My eating was completely out of control. I could easily eat a large pizza on my own and still have room for dessert. Moreover, my diabetes was still out of control. Though I thought I was ready to make the commitment, I still drank pop and ate junk food and fast food.
May 18th, 2014 was the day I had received the call that I had been approved for surgery. The nurse on the phone stated that my surgery would be June 3rd, 2014, and my 2-week liquid diet would start on May 20th. I was nervous and scared. Since I was afraid of dying during surgery, I wrote Marvin and Sophia each letters in case I did die. I told them both how much they meant to me and how much I loved them. I even told my husband in the letter that I wanted him to remarry to find a good wife and mother for our Sophia. So my road to health began in the following weeks as I began to prepare for the rest of my life. It was my goal to get rid of all the junk food and pop in the house, but I drank pop like no other and began to have food funerals for some of the things I could never eat again. I also stocked up on things I would need for my 2-week liquid diet witch consisted of sugar free jello, water, broth, and protein shakes.
May 19th, 2014 was the day before my liquid diet. I ate the entire day and I also drank Diet Coke all day long. For dinner that night, I ate over ½ of a large pizza and at 11:59 had my last drink of Diet Coke (Which I have not had since). By this time everyone at work and friends knew of my upcoming surgery. It still brings me to tears when I think about all the support and encouragement I received from my amazing co-workers. The entire staff at Clive kept me going during my liquid diet. By the end of my liquid diet, I was exhausted. I was also scared from knowing that my life was about to change.
June 2nd, 2014 was the day before my surgery. I was scared, sick to my stomach most of the day and I cried and prayed most of the night.
June 3rd, 2014: The day had finally arrived. My surgery was scheduled for 11:00 am and the surgeon was on time. My last weigh-in was 350 pounds. While I was being prepped for surgery I took several selfies to ease my nerves and even played around with some of the equipment trying to make light of the situation. My mom was with me. In between nurses coming in and out, I so desperately wanted to tell her how I wished I had listened to her all those years. I also wanted to thank her and my dad for adopting Adam and I. Before I had a chance to say what I wanted, the nurse came to walk me back to surgery. All I could do was hug her and tell her how much I loved her. The minute I left her sight I began to cry. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as I walked to the operating room. My beloved Sophia and Marvin came to mind and I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs how much I loved them!!! As I walked though the double doors of the operating room, I began to cry hysterically. When I saw the many nurses there, it gave me a flashback of my dear brother lying on the operating table. I will never forget the deafening sound of that heart monitor. When I was lying on the table, I remember begging the Anesthesiologist to not let me die. When I awoke I was not in pain but remember thanking God that I did not die. The next few days in the hospital involved typical post-operative routine of walking laps, sipping broth, and managing my pain. The following days at home were filled with sleep, pain meds and sipping water. I was very thankful to have some great friends who came to get Sophia during the day so that I could rest. I also received several calls and texts from family and friends, their support carried me through. I also lost who I thought was a good friend. She called to “check on me” and in the conversation she stated that we would probably not be friends anymore due to the fact that we would not be able to eat junk food/fast food any more and would not have anything in common. At the time, I was too sick and in pain to care. By the end of my first week post-op, I could barely walk. Every single muscle in my body hurt, especially my legs. On the day of my one-week post-op visit to the surgeon I could barely walk to the waiting room. Before the surgeon even came into the room, I was in tears and completely exhausted. My Surgeon took one look at me and declared I was severely dehydrated. I went to the hospital to have a Pic line inserted in my arm (IV) and it hurt like hell!! For the next four weeks, I carried a around a backpack full of an IV bag of water, which had to be pumped through a small machine. For the first time in my life I hated leaving the house and my days were filled with thoughts of “what the hell have I done to myself.” My arm looked terrible with a long tube coming out of it. The comments that came from strangers were too much for me. I also had a nurse come every week to change the dressing around the Pic line. I was not used to having so many people come to my home and made me resent this surgery even more. My days were filled with crushing every pill I had to take and mixing it with my Jell-O (disgusting), trying to get small bites of food, and drinking water. I was not mentally prepared for how “All Consuming” this was.
Gold’s Gym Toward the middle of August I began to feel a bit better, but still felt like crap most days.
I walked into Gold’s Gym at the time they were the cheapest. I remember feeling sick as I walked in and almost turned around to walk back out, but I really needed to make this work. I kept thinking: “Gold’s? What the hell was I even going to do here?” I also thought this is a place for body builders and not people like me. True to their reputation some guy (who had little man syndrome), showed me around. As he was pointing out various machines, he acted as if my mere presence bothered him. My tour was over in a couple of minutes. I really needed to make this work, so I signed for a membership. Part of the package was a free training session with one of the trainers, but I could not meet a trainer until the following week, so I just rode the stationary bike. The following week I met with a trainer and I was a bit excited to have someone help me navigate my way around. So out walks this little tiny chic. She was clearly there for people watching her ass than her job. She sat down and asked me a few questions. I was immediately annoyed with her and we didn’t even exercise the day I sat down with her. When we finally did “train,” she showed me what she thought was the proper form on how to do squats and 10 minutes on the bike. She hounded me every day about signing on with her. By this time, weeks had gone by and all I was doing was the bike and some squats. One day she asked when would be a good time to sign up with her and I was so annoyed this time, I flat out told her that NEVER would be a good time. That took care of it because she never spoke to me again. This chic and that guy I previously spoke of no longer work at Gold’s Gym. From September to December, I tried a few things here and there but was getting bored and hating coming to the gym. Of course I thought about quitting, but for some reason I stayed. I now love coming to Gold’s. The entire staff is friendly and helpful. I have made friends with some of the employees and some of the patrons that attend the gym. I know the entire staff at Gold’s is dedicated to helping people reach their fitness goals. They feel like an extended family to me and I look forward to coming everyday.
Meeting Alex One evening in December I noticed a trainer off to the side overlooking the gym floor. I wanted to know how to work a machine. As I approached him, my first thought was “this guy better not give any bullshit and just answer my question.” I walked up and asked my question. I was taken back by his soft-spoken tone. He answered my question and was very polite. He then asked if I had ever tried boxing. I laughed to myself thinking is this guy serious!!! I simply stated no, and thanked him for his time. He suggested that perhaps I should give it a try and offered me a free boxing session. I figured, what the hell, he is Good looking, plus he looked as though he might be ripped. At least I would have some eye candy while working out with him. My first training session with Alex was fun as he showed me some moves. I was nervous but at the same time had an absolute blast. There was something very powerful in hitting something. It was a total release for me of built up anger, hurt, and sadness. I loved it and wish it didn’t have to end. As a matter of fact, I remember crying most of the night like I had some kind of break though. It really was a turning point for me. However I did not like Alex and after our first session, he asked if I would like to sign on with him. Though I was totally hooked on boxing, I told him I could not afford it (all he wanted was my money, so I thought). I continued to go to the gym as often as I could but was still not committed to it. After the holidays, Alex would stop by and ask how I was and if I still wanted to sign with him. I made up some bullshit story. I didn’t like him, I thought he was arrogant (exactly what I thought most trainers would be like), and I didn’t trust him. I kept thinking about boxing and if I was going to be serious about losing weight maybe this guy could help. So a few weeks later I signed with Alex. We first started out with boxing, which was fine with me. I loved every minute of it. I still did not like Alex, though he was never rude and did his job. I felt like I was just all about the paycheck to him. During this time I started to become serious about exercising and I felt once a week was just not cutting it if I wanted to see any kind of results. I bit the bullet about a month later and signed on with Alex 2x a week. As I worked with Alex a little more, I slowly got to know him. I still felt he was a bit arrogant but by the time I signed with Alex 3x a week, I know he is actually quite the opposite of what I first thought of him. I totally trust Alex, and he is not in any way out to get my money. Alex is soft spoken and he is patient with every exercise I try to get. Alex is a great person. He is a great father to his daughter even though I have never witnessed any encounters between them. When Alex speaks of his daughter, his eyes light up and the love he speaks of her would melt any ones heart. He is caring, kind and professional. I often tell Alex when working out, that I hate him and often tell him several times during my workouts. Truth be known, I don’t hate him at all. I love Alex! I love Alex because he pushes me, and makes me do things I didn’t even know I could do. I love him because I see results and because everyone notices how great I look. I love Alex because he has helped me gain a whole new level of self-confidence which I have NEVER had my entire life. I love Alex because he takes my constant whining and me telling him I can’t do whatever he asks me to do. I love Alex because I know he wants me to succeed and is proud of me when I do. I love Alex because he has helped me be a better person, and I love him because he makes even the hardest of workouts fun. I am blessed to have him as my personal trainer, and will be forever grateful to him. Alex goes above and beyond. Now I consider him a friend and he is essential to my weight loss journey!!! I will always support Alex and have his back if needed. For those of you thinking I have “the hots” for my trainer, the love and respect I have for Alex is NOT that kind of love. I believe that God puts people in your life for a reason and there was certainly a reason for Alex. So again from the bottom of my heart thank you Alex Chavez.
Where Am I Now Since the time of this article I have lost 150 pounds. I have a long way to go on this weight loss journey and the day-to-day struggles are real. Every day is a struggle to not put junk food or garbage in my mouth. Sometimes I have to take it hour by hour during times of stress.
I’m slowly starting to see a difference in the way I look and feel. I am starting to see my self in a good way for once. I feel like I’m taking care of myself instead of being a doormat. There comes a time in life when you just get sick and tired of literally being sick and tired. I am not that person any more. I now work out every day and 3x a week twice a day. I train with Alex 3x a week; I try to get at least 1000 calories in every day and no more than 70 grams of carbohydrates. I also love fruit and spinach smoothies. When I’m bored at night, I often exercise. Yes, I’m aware that my addiction has transferred in to exercising, but I am terrified of going back to weighing 350 pounds. It will NEVER happen again. God has given me this tool and I swear I will not waste it. I used to be able to eat several fast food burgers in one setting now the mere smell of fast food makes me physically sick. I Am off all diabetes meds, and no longer have high blood pressure. I am not physically fit by any means and I have a long road to go, but I will never give up!!! It is truly by the grace of God that I am here to tell my story. My goal for the future is to get down to 130-120 pounds and I will continue to do whatever it takes to get there. I also want to be a support person for those who have had or having the weight loss surgery. I want to make Hospital rounds for those who just had weight loss surgery. I want to be of help to those who may not have the support that I have had or just be a helpful person and knowing what patients are going through.
I really am starting to like the person I’m becoming, but loosing a lot of weight is not easy. I’m still trying to get over hating my body when I look in the mirror due to all my loose skin, I hate clothes shopping and still wanting to buy larger sizes. And the cost can get expensive. But the cost by far out weighs the ultimate cost of losing my life because of my weight and food addiction. One thing I do know for sure, no matter where you are at in your fitness level or if you feel you can’t start a fitness program …I HEAR YA!!! But you owe it to yourself and your family to at least try. I promise the people at the gym don’t care about how you look or what you are doing. You are not there for them anyway. So WHY WEIGHT???? Thank you for reading and allowing me to share my story I hope it will be of help to someone.
Thanks And Appreciation I cannot begin to thank everyone for all the support and encouragement they have given me. But I would like to name a few.
First and foremost my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ: Thank you for giving me this second chance in life and the loving Grace you show me daily.
Marvin: My wonderful husband of 22 years. Who supports me no matter what, who works endless hours to help support us, and who loves me no matter how I look or act, I love you to the moon and back.
Sophia: My beautiful daughter. In my darkest days you are the sole reason for getting out of bed. Thank you for getting up at 5:30 a.m. and going to the gym with me and never complaining. I love you more than life and will go to the ends of the earth for you.
Denise: My dear friend and rock. There are a million things to say and you already know them all
To the entire staff at Clive Elementary: Thank you for the love and support you give me each and everyday. I am truly blessed to work with such amazing people.
Holly McGuire: Thank you for helping bring Sophia into this world and for being such a great friend and some times an exercise buddy
Wendi and Marron: I love you both and will never forget the love and support you give me daily even when I feel like giving up.
Meltin Mamas: Thank you! so lucky to have a wonderful group who knows exactly how I feel
Kathy: Thank you for everything! I could not have done this without you, for taking Sophia as one of your own so that I can work out and continue on my road to health.
My sister Stacie: Who has been there for me through all my ups and downs this past year. I love you more than ever!!!
My mom and dad: Thank you for being there for me during surgery and supporting my decision and for adopting Adam and I. I will always be grateful!!!
Last but not least Dr. Mark Smolik: Thank you for being so patient and kind and never treating me as though I am a number and for helping to save my life.
And for everyone else who’s names I did not mention please know the love and support you have shown me and continue to show me I am forever grateful.
Peggy L. Minter
For comments, questions or support please email to
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The last 13 pictures of my slideshow are from my first 5k Gladiator Assault Challenge. I finished in 3hours 30 minutes with 30 obstacles. It was hard, painful and FUN!
Some adult language
My story begins like so many others, but no one has the same story so here is mine. I can never remember being thin. From a very young age, my brother and I grew up in and out of foster care. We were placed in the hands of strangers to care for us. All of them were very neglectful and abusive to both my brother and I. A lot of times we were left to fend for ourselves or completely on our own. At one point we lived with a couple for quite some time until the woman of the house died. I remember being very frightened when she died. Her husband quickly became an alcoholic and thus ended up being very neglectful. We would go days without bathing, and the house was dirty and infested with roaches. I learned to cook at a pretty young age in order to take care of both my brother and I. Filling our bellies consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, fried eggs, and sugary cereals. One of our favorite dinners was a sandwich of bread and butter with sugar on it (Yes, I know that sounds disgusting). At times, we would eat anything we could get our hands on just to get full which often meant sneaking food. This went on for years. This is when my eating habits developed, and I began to eat anything I could get my hands on. This was my escape especially after times of physical and sexual abuse that happened daily and often more than once a day. So I began to eat. I ate when I was hurting, confused, and afraid and I ate even more when I was worried about my brother.
October 1983 Finally, our misery came to an end. My brother and I were adopted. Though our abuse stopped, my abuse with food did not. As I adjusted to my permanent home and new family, I continued to eat. Through my teen years, I began to get heavier and heavier. My adopted mother, truly the only mother my brother and I have ever known, made relentless attempts to put me on a “diet.” This made me resent her and made me feel as though I would never be good enough for her or anything else in life. All through high school, I was on and off diets such as 1000-calorie diets and Slim Fast Shakes. My mother at one point even bought me subliminal music in order to “help” me lose weight. I also did the whole binge and throw up thing for a while. I was desperate and wanted my mom to like me. I just wanted to be good enough; but, I had no self-worth and I snuck fast food and junk food all the time. My love for Diet Coke, food, and baked goods got out of control as I went through culinary school. My weight was steadily climbing. When I moved out on my own, I remember waking up in the middle of the night thinking to myself, “I can eat anything I want.” I was not aware of this at the time, but clearly my food addiction was in full swing and I never thought I had a problem.
Marvin When I met my Husband in 1992, he did not seem to mind that I weighed 200 pounds. Marvin and I married in 1993. My family always loved me; but, for the first time in my life, I felt loved, wanted, needed, and finally good enough. When it came to my food choices, though not his fault, Marvin supported them. Whatever I wanted to cook for us was fine with him. Marvin was and continues to be the love of my life. As our marriage grew, we took vacations and it would be fun to find different plus-size clothing stores. At times, Marvin would spend hundreds of dollars in one particular store. I would usually walk in and start pulling things off the rack. It was fun and made me feel good. So I started to not care about my weight, but deep down wanted so desperately to be thin. As time went on, I continued to eat whatever and whenever I wanted. I was even diagnosed with type 2 diabetes on the same day I suggested to Marvin that we go have pizza for dinner. So life went on going from over-weight to obese to morbidly obese. At times I would try to lose a few pounds here and there. I was joining gym after gym after gym. I never stayed because I was too embarrassed to even give most of it a try. After a while, I just gave up. I figured, why bother. Marvin loved me for who I was and how big I was, BUT I DID NOT LOVE ME. Over the years, I had made some lasting friendships and they didn’t care about my weight, so why should I. Life continued with my knees hurting, my back hurting, my diabetes, taking insulin and still eating anything and everything I wanted with my weight steadily climbing.
Sophia June 1st, 2006 was the day I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant with my daughter. I was happy, yet very confused. I had always told everyone that I did not want children; it was really easier that way. I am not saying that I did not want children, but with my weight I knew it would be hard on the baby and me. Right away, I was placed in the high-risk category. I had to see the Obstetrician twice a month. I had Ultra-sounds of Sophia every single month. The last weekend of my pregnancy, I was put on bed rest due to my blood pressure being too high. By the time my precious Sophia was born, my weight had ballooned to 380. The second I laid eyes on her, she instantly became the reason for my existence. As Sophia grew from an infant to a toddler, keeping up with her was exhausting. At times, just playing with her or keeping her from harm would leave me out of breath. I remember thinking one day if I didn’t do something about my weight, I was sure to never see her grow up. So, again, life went on and I returned to drinking my Diet Coke. I would rather have that than breakfast and often that’s exactly what I did. I remember when Sophia was old enough to go to preschool, I would drop her off and then go through the drive-though at Burger King and order 2 sausage and cheese croissants and the biggest Diet Coke. I did this every day for at least 6 weeks. Then another food kick would start in. and on and on it went.
Adam OCT 28th, 2012, life as I knew it came to a screeching, sreaming, and complete stop. Life has never been the same nor will it ever be. My only brother died which was something that will forever be burned into my memory. I can remember every conversation and detail of that day like a time-line. Adam was 38 years old, healthy, and not over-weight. He also ate pretty healthy. Adam originally collapsed from a bowel obstruction, but after hours and hours of surgery and relentless attempts to save him, they could not. I watched my beloved Adam take his last breath. It was really something out of a horror film. Still, to this day, I cannot stand the sight and smell of blood. Even certain sounds will forever haunt me. During my time of immense mourning, I continued to eat EVERYTHING. I did not know how to cope, and some days I couldn’t even get out of bed. Also during this time, I began to really think long and hard about my weight. I thought if my healthy brother died, then I was sure to follow. I did not even know where to start, so I continued to do what I did best, drink Diet Coke and eat. I even started passing out and thinking I was having a heart attack. My legs, back and chest were constantly hurting. On top of that, my heart was completely broke. I had seen several doctors and even had to wear a heart monitor for a weekend. After several tests, I was diagnosed with PTSD (from the death of my brother) and Anxiety. When the fog lifted from my grief (about 2 years), I still felt like crap. So I decided that if I was going to do something about my weight, I needed to do it.
Vertical Sleeve Gastronomy (VSG)
I began to ask my Doctor about some weight loss options. She suggested it was time to have weight loss surgery. She gave me the number to call Mercy Weight Loss and Nutrition Center. Before I made my call, I spoke with Marvin about my plan. Marvin, the quiet type, did not say much; but he fully supported my decision. So, the next day I made my call. I remember shaking as I was punching in the numbers. I kept thinking is this what a drug addict or alcoholic feels when they make their first call for help. As a woman one the other end picked up, I began to cry and be unable to catch my breath while talking to her. From the day of my first call to surgery date it took about a year. This began as classes, seminars, 6 months of diet and exercise counseling, meeting with the nutritionist and surgeon. The first time I saw the surgeon, he stated that my goal would be to lose 200 pounds. I remember him telling me I would need to find an exercise program and I flat out told him I was ready to change but he would never see me in a gym. It was just too hard. I left his office in tears thinking this guy was out of his damn mind. How could anyone like me lose that much weight? So, I went to the nearest gas station to drown my sorrows in the biggest Diet Coke I could get. During these classes I began to learn more and more about how hard I would have to work for the rest of my life. I also discovered that I would never be able to have caffeine, pop, and certain other foods. During this time, I stocked up on pop BIG TIME. I was drinking 2-3 two liters of Diet Coke every day. I would drink more on stressful days. My eating was completely out of control. I could easily eat a large pizza on my own and still have room for dessert. Moreover, my diabetes was still out of control. Though I thought I was ready to make the commitment, I still drank pop and ate junk food and fast food.
May 18th, 2014 was the day I had received the call that I had been approved for surgery. The nurse on the phone stated that my surgery would be June 3rd, 2014, and my 2-week liquid diet would start on May 20th. I was nervous and scared. Since I was afraid of dying during surgery, I wrote Marvin and Sophia each letters in case I did die. I told them both how much they meant to me and how much I loved them. I even told my husband in the letter that I wanted him to remarry to find a good wife and mother for our Sophia. So my road to health began in the following weeks as I began to prepare for the rest of my life. It was my goal to get rid of all the junk food and pop in the house, but I drank pop like no other and began to have food funerals for some of the things I could never eat again. I also stocked up on things I would need for my 2-week liquid diet witch consisted of sugar free jello, water, broth, and protein shakes.
May 19th, 2014 was the day before my liquid diet. I ate the entire day and I also drank Diet Coke all day long. For dinner that night, I ate over ½ of a large pizza and at 11:59 had my last drink of Diet Coke (Which I have not had since). By this time everyone at work and friends knew of my upcoming surgery. It still brings me to tears when I think about all the support and encouragement I received from my amazing co-workers. The entire staff at Clive kept me going during my liquid diet. By the end of my liquid diet, I was exhausted. I was also scared from knowing that my life was about to change.
June 2nd, 2014 was the day before my surgery. I was scared, sick to my stomach most of the day and I cried and prayed most of the night.
June 3rd, 2014: The day had finally arrived. My surgery was scheduled for 11:00 am and the surgeon was on time. My last weigh-in was 350 pounds. While I was being prepped for surgery I took several selfies to ease my nerves and even played around with some of the equipment trying to make light of the situation. My mom was with me. In between nurses coming in and out, I so desperately wanted to tell her how I wished I had listened to her all those years. I also wanted to thank her and my dad for adopting Adam and I. Before I had a chance to say what I wanted, the nurse came to walk me back to surgery. All I could do was hug her and tell her how much I loved her. The minute I left her sight I began to cry. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as I walked to the operating room. My beloved Sophia and Marvin came to mind and I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs how much I loved them!!! As I walked though the double doors of the operating room, I began to cry hysterically. When I saw the many nurses there, it gave me a flashback of my dear brother lying on the operating table. I will never forget the deafening sound of that heart monitor. When I was lying on the table, I remember begging the Anesthesiologist to not let me die. When I awoke I was not in pain but remember thanking God that I did not die. The next few days in the hospital involved typical post-operative routine of walking laps, sipping broth, and managing my pain. The following days at home were filled with sleep, pain meds and sipping water. I was very thankful to have some great friends who came to get Sophia during the day so that I could rest. I also received several calls and texts from family and friends, their support carried me through. I also lost who I thought was a good friend. She called to “check on me” and in the conversation she stated that we would probably not be friends anymore due to the fact that we would not be able to eat junk food/fast food any more and would not have anything in common. At the time, I was too sick and in pain to care. By the end of my first week post-op, I could barely walk. Every single muscle in my body hurt, especially my legs. On the day of my one-week post-op visit to the surgeon I could barely walk to the waiting room. Before the surgeon even came into the room, I was in tears and completely exhausted. My Surgeon took one look at me and declared I was severely dehydrated. I went to the hospital to have a Pic line inserted in my arm (IV) and it hurt like hell!! For the next four weeks, I carried a around a backpack full of an IV bag of water, which had to be pumped through a small machine. For the first time in my life I hated leaving the house and my days were filled with thoughts of “what the hell have I done to myself.” My arm looked terrible with a long tube coming out of it. The comments that came from strangers were too much for me. I also had a nurse come every week to change the dressing around the Pic line. I was not used to having so many people come to my home and made me resent this surgery even more. My days were filled with crushing every pill I had to take and mixing it with my Jell-O (disgusting), trying to get small bites of food, and drinking water. I was not mentally prepared for how “All Consuming” this was.
Gold’s Gym Toward the middle of August I began to feel a bit better, but still felt like crap most days.
I walked into Gold’s Gym at the time they were the cheapest. I remember feeling sick as I walked in and almost turned around to walk back out, but I really needed to make this work. I kept thinking: “Gold’s? What the hell was I even going to do here?” I also thought this is a place for body builders and not people like me. True to their reputation some guy (who had little man syndrome), showed me around. As he was pointing out various machines, he acted as if my mere presence bothered him. My tour was over in a couple of minutes. I really needed to make this work, so I signed for a membership. Part of the package was a free training session with one of the trainers, but I could not meet a trainer until the following week, so I just rode the stationary bike. The following week I met with a trainer and I was a bit excited to have someone help me navigate my way around. So out walks this little tiny chic. She was clearly there for people watching her ass than her job. She sat down and asked me a few questions. I was immediately annoyed with her and we didn’t even exercise the day I sat down with her. When we finally did “train,” she showed me what she thought was the proper form on how to do squats and 10 minutes on the bike. She hounded me every day about signing on with her. By this time, weeks had gone by and all I was doing was the bike and some squats. One day she asked when would be a good time to sign up with her and I was so annoyed this time, I flat out told her that NEVER would be a good time. That took care of it because she never spoke to me again. This chic and that guy I previously spoke of no longer work at Gold’s Gym. From September to December, I tried a few things here and there but was getting bored and hating coming to the gym. Of course I thought about quitting, but for some reason I stayed. I now love coming to Gold’s. The entire staff is friendly and helpful. I have made friends with some of the employees and some of the patrons that attend the gym. I know the entire staff at Gold’s is dedicated to helping people reach their fitness goals. They feel like an extended family to me and I look forward to coming everyday.
Meeting Alex One evening in December I noticed a trainer off to the side overlooking the gym floor. I wanted to know how to work a machine. As I approached him, my first thought was “this guy better not give any bullshit and just answer my question.” I walked up and asked my question. I was taken back by his soft-spoken tone. He answered my question and was very polite. He then asked if I had ever tried boxing. I laughed to myself thinking is this guy serious!!! I simply stated no, and thanked him for his time. He suggested that perhaps I should give it a try and offered me a free boxing session. I figured, what the hell, he is Good looking, plus he looked as though he might be ripped. At least I would have some eye candy while working out with him. My first training session with Alex was fun as he showed me some moves. I was nervous but at the same time had an absolute blast. There was something very powerful in hitting something. It was a total release for me of built up anger, hurt, and sadness. I loved it and wish it didn’t have to end. As a matter of fact, I remember crying most of the night like I had some kind of break though. It really was a turning point for me. However I did not like Alex and after our first session, he asked if I would like to sign on with him. Though I was totally hooked on boxing, I told him I could not afford it (all he wanted was my money, so I thought). I continued to go to the gym as often as I could but was still not committed to it. After the holidays, Alex would stop by and ask how I was and if I still wanted to sign with him. I made up some bullshit story. I didn’t like him, I thought he was arrogant (exactly what I thought most trainers would be like), and I didn’t trust him. I kept thinking about boxing and if I was going to be serious about losing weight maybe this guy could help. So a few weeks later I signed with Alex. We first started out with boxing, which was fine with me. I loved every minute of it. I still did not like Alex, though he was never rude and did his job. I felt like I was just all about the paycheck to him. During this time I started to become serious about exercising and I felt once a week was just not cutting it if I wanted to see any kind of results. I bit the bullet about a month later and signed on with Alex 2x a week. As I worked with Alex a little more, I slowly got to know him. I still felt he was a bit arrogant but by the time I signed with Alex 3x a week, I know he is actually quite the opposite of what I first thought of him. I totally trust Alex, and he is not in any way out to get my money. Alex is soft spoken and he is patient with every exercise I try to get. Alex is a great person. He is a great father to his daughter even though I have never witnessed any encounters between them. When Alex speaks of his daughter, his eyes light up and the love he speaks of her would melt any ones heart. He is caring, kind and professional. I often tell Alex when working out, that I hate him and often tell him several times during my workouts. Truth be known, I don’t hate him at all. I love Alex! I love Alex because he pushes me, and makes me do things I didn’t even know I could do. I love him because I see results and because everyone notices how great I look. I love Alex because he has helped me gain a whole new level of self-confidence which I have NEVER had my entire life. I love Alex because he takes my constant whining and me telling him I can’t do whatever he asks me to do. I love Alex because I know he wants me to succeed and is proud of me when I do. I love Alex because he has helped me be a better person, and I love him because he makes even the hardest of workouts fun. I am blessed to have him as my personal trainer, and will be forever grateful to him. Alex goes above and beyond. Now I consider him a friend and he is essential to my weight loss journey!!! I will always support Alex and have his back if needed. For those of you thinking I have “the hots” for my trainer, the love and respect I have for Alex is NOT that kind of love. I believe that God puts people in your life for a reason and there was certainly a reason for Alex. So again from the bottom of my heart thank you Alex Chavez.
Where Am I Now Since the time of this article I have lost 150 pounds. I have a long way to go on this weight loss journey and the day-to-day struggles are real. Every day is a struggle to not put junk food or garbage in my mouth. Sometimes I have to take it hour by hour during times of stress.
I’m slowly starting to see a difference in the way I look and feel. I am starting to see my self in a good way for once. I feel like I’m taking care of myself instead of being a doormat. There comes a time in life when you just get sick and tired of literally being sick and tired. I am not that person any more. I now work out every day and 3x a week twice a day. I train with Alex 3x a week; I try to get at least 1000 calories in every day and no more than 70 grams of carbohydrates. I also love fruit and spinach smoothies. When I’m bored at night, I often exercise. Yes, I’m aware that my addiction has transferred in to exercising, but I am terrified of going back to weighing 350 pounds. It will NEVER happen again. God has given me this tool and I swear I will not waste it. I used to be able to eat several fast food burgers in one setting now the mere smell of fast food makes me physically sick. I Am off all diabetes meds, and no longer have high blood pressure. I am not physically fit by any means and I have a long road to go, but I will never give up!!! It is truly by the grace of God that I am here to tell my story. My goal for the future is to get down to 130-120 pounds and I will continue to do whatever it takes to get there. I also want to be a support person for those who have had or having the weight loss surgery. I want to make Hospital rounds for those who just had weight loss surgery. I want to be of help to those who may not have the support that I have had or just be a helpful person and knowing what patients are going through.
I really am starting to like the person I’m becoming, but loosing a lot of weight is not easy. I’m still trying to get over hating my body when I look in the mirror due to all my loose skin, I hate clothes shopping and still wanting to buy larger sizes. And the cost can get expensive. But the cost by far out weighs the ultimate cost of losing my life because of my weight and food addiction. One thing I do know for sure, no matter where you are at in your fitness level or if you feel you can’t start a fitness program …I HEAR YA!!! But you owe it to yourself and your family to at least try. I promise the people at the gym don’t care about how you look or what you are doing. You are not there for them anyway. So WHY WEIGHT???? Thank you for reading and allowing me to share my story I hope it will be of help to someone.
Thanks And Appreciation I cannot begin to thank everyone for all the support and encouragement they have given me. But I would like to name a few.
First and foremost my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ: Thank you for giving me this second chance in life and the loving Grace you show me daily.
Marvin: My wonderful husband of 22 years. Who supports me no matter what, who works endless hours to help support us, and who loves me no matter how I look or act, I love you to the moon and back.
Sophia: My beautiful daughter. In my darkest days you are the sole reason for getting out of bed. Thank you for getting up at 5:30 a.m. and going to the gym with me and never complaining. I love you more than life and will go to the ends of the earth for you.
Denise: My dear friend and rock. There are a million things to say and you already know them all
To the entire staff at Clive Elementary: Thank you for the love and support you give me each and everyday. I am truly blessed to work with such amazing people.
Holly McGuire: Thank you for helping bring Sophia into this world and for being such a great friend and some times an exercise buddy
Wendi and Marron: I love you both and will never forget the love and support you give me daily even when I feel like giving up.
Meltin Mamas: Thank you! so lucky to have a wonderful group who knows exactly how I feel
Kathy: Thank you for everything! I could not have done this without you, for taking Sophia as one of your own so that I can work out and continue on my road to health.
My sister Stacie: Who has been there for me through all my ups and downs this past year. I love you more than ever!!!
My mom and dad: Thank you for being there for me during surgery and supporting my decision and for adopting Adam and I. I will always be grateful!!!
Last but not least Dr. Mark Smolik: Thank you for being so patient and kind and never treating me as though I am a number and for helping to save my life.
And for everyone else who’s names I did not mention please know the love and support you have shown me and continue to show me I am forever grateful.
Peggy L. Minter
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The last 13 pictures of my slideshow are from my first 5k Gladiator Assault Challenge. I finished in 3hours 30 minutes with 30 obstacles. It was hard, painful and FUN!